Felieton

Waldek i Przyjaciele

Jak robić biznes, to z fachowcami. Jak zarabiać, to miliardy. Wiedział o tym Kulczyk, podobno biznesmen, który w gratisie miliard od upadłego rządu dostał. Autostrada Dojności doi kierowców aż miło. Dzieci Kulczyka są zadowolone. Polacy mniej, ale to przecież nieistotne. Wiedział o tych zasadach Waldek, główny Długopis sławnego na całą Europę kontraktu gazowego z Rosjanami.

Kim jest ten strażnik interesu i Długopis w jednym? Moim skromnym zdaniem jest wybitnym, lojalnym, oddanym, bezinteresownym reprezentantem Interesu. Partii Interesu. Przyjrzyjmy się dokładniej panu Waldkowi. Panie Waldku, pan się nie boi, cała partia za panem stoi. Jaka partia?

Pan Waldek był wzorowym uczniem, studentem i członkiem partii. Miał nosa politycznego. W 1985 r. czując Wiatr w Plecy i Podmuch Historii wstąpił do komunistycznego Zjednoczonego Stronnictwa Ludowego. A było ono tak ludowe, jak całe PZPR robotnicze, a Platforma obywatelska. Wtedy odpalił karierę na całego. Wkrótce został posłem Sejmu Karłowatego, przez niektórych nazywanego kontraktowym. Po rozwiązaniu ZSL został członkiem kolejnych Parawanów PSL.

Co najważniejsze i wiekopomne, w czasie obalania przez TW Bolka i towarzyszy – kiedyś i wkrótce szeregowych – Kiszczaka i Jaruzelskiego, pierwszego niekomunistycznego rządu 5 czerwca 1992 r., został poklepany po plecach i uczyniony Pierwszym Zderzakiem. Taką miał moc Lecha Wałęsa. Strach przed teczkami był wielki. A klepanie po plecach miało znaczenie. Lech nie klepał byle kogo.

Noc Obalenia i Klepania odpowiednich towarzyszy była kluczowa i niezapomniana dla losów Waldka. Ten duch wierności i oddania nie został nigdy zapomniany. To była jedna z tych chwil, które decydują o całym życiu. Lech poklepał Waldka, Donalda, a nawet Stefana i kilku innych. Tak było. Tak mówią świadkowie i tak zaprzeczają agenci. A historycy chowają się ze strachu przed interpretacją. Tak już ma ten Duch Historii. Póki wieje, to ludzie wieją.

Po tym klepnięciu, można powiedzieć Klepnięciu Założycielskim pan Waldek stał się jednym z najskuteczniej obracających się szefów partii w postkomunistycznej Prawie Rzeczypospolitej. Bywał premierem, wicepremierem, ministrem, prezesem. Bywał na salonach i na bankietach. Po prostu bywał, bo dostąpił Klepnięcia. Teraz też bywa, ale ciszej.

Jego epokowe osiągnięcie biznesowe, czyli kontrakt na sponiewieranie Polaków przez Rosjan miał miejsce w grudniu 2010 r. Waldek był wówczas – od 16 listopada 2007 r. ministrem gospodarki i wicepremierem w rządzie Donalda Tuska. Panowie klepnęli kontrakt tak mocno, aż w Moskwie kapsle od wódki strzelały przez miesiąc. Tak mówią ci, co nic nie mówią. Wiadomo.

To dzięki Waldkowi i Donaldowi od 1 kwietnia 2012 r. za rosyjski gaz płacimy jak za lot w kosmos. Cena gazu została „związana” z ceną ropy i jest prawie 2-krotnie wyższa niż dla Zachodu. Ale co tam, mieli gest chłopaki. Ponadto przyklepano zakaz reeksportu, czyli musimy płacić, także wtedy, gdy nie jesteśmy w stanie gazu zużyć. Tylko się cieszyć, nieprawdaż? To byli wybitni negocjatorzy. Walczyli o Interes. Dzięki Waldku, pan się nie boi, cała partia i kolega z Brukseli za panem stoją.

Rząd Tuska uznał to upokorzenie za wielki sukces, będący ponoć dowodem bardzo dobrych stosunków z Rosją. Też tak myślę. Wielki sukces. Chciał Tusk do 2037 klepnąć, ale mu się nie udało. Więc chyba średnio wielki, bo do 2022 r. podpisano. Putin był w miarę zadowolony. Donald był zadowolony bardzo. Długopis Waldek też był zadowolony. Dziś dowiadujemy się jeszcze, że przy okazji miliard Ruskim umorzono, bo prosili. A nasi „negocjatorzy” nie odmówili pomocy. Tacy są bezinteresowni. Ponadto chcieli klepnąć do 2045 r.! Jak mawia klasyk Janusz Rewiński: „Mieli rozmach sk…yny”.

Ostatnio politycznie w Polsce się trochę pozmieniało, więc pan Waldek i Przyjaciele będą ostro walczyć o powtórzenie tego sukcesu biznesowego. Bądźmy tego pewni. Pan Waldek na pewno nie boi się. Donald też nie, przecież Angela go klepnęła. A miliardy same się nie przeleją, gaz sam nie podrożeje, no i karuzele nie rozbujają się bez pomocy wybitnych, bezinteresownych, lojalnych, niezależnych, biznesmenów. Gorąca będzie jesień tego roku.

Dr Paweł Janowski

Redaktor naczelny miesięcznika „Czas Solidarności”

Felieton ukazał się w najnowszym wydaniu „Tygodnika Solidarność”

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